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Best Animals Jokes

Top jokes, ranked by Weird.net users. Join free →

  1. #1 Why are elephants so wrinkly? Have you ever tried to iron one? Animals 100% liked · 6 votes
  2. #2 Why are dogs bad dancers? They have two left feet — and two right ones too. Animals 67% liked · 6 votes
  3. #3 What's a dog's favorite kind of pizza? Pup-eroni. Animals 100% liked · 2 votes
  4. #4 What did the duck say to the bartender? Put it on my bill. Animals 100% liked · 2 votes
  5. #5 Why don't cats play poker in the wild? Too many cheetahs. Animals 100% liked · 2 votes
  6. #6 Why did the rooster cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken. Animals 100% liked · 2 votes
  7. #7 What do you call a goose that's good at math? A protractor. Animals
  8. #8 Why was the elephant kicked out of the pool? He couldn't keep his trunks up. Animals
  9. #9 Why don't dogs make good dancers? They have two left paws. Animals
  10. #10 What's a hen's favorite kind of currency? A chick-bond. Animals
  11. #11 Why did the pig leave the party? Everyone thought he was a boar. Animals
  12. #12 What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bor. Animals
  13. #13 What do you call a cow during an earthquake? A milkshake. Animals
  14. #14 Why don't lobsters share their toys? Because they're shellfish — we know, we said this. They're really shellfish. Animals
  15. #15 What does an octopus wear in winter? A coat of arms. Animals
  16. #16 What's a fish's favorite TV show? Whale of Fortune. Animals
  17. #17 What do you call a llama with no eyes? A llma. Animals
  18. #18 Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't know the words either. Animals
  19. #19 How does a turtle reach high places? It carries a tortoise ladder. Animals
  20. #20 What's a frog's favorite snack? Hop-corn. Animals
  21. #21 What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk. Animals
  22. #22 What do you call an ant that won't go away? Per-mant. Animals
  23. #23 Why did the cat sit on the laptop? It wanted to be on top of the trends. Animals
  24. #24 Why do bears have hairy coats? Fur protection. Animals
  25. #25 What do you call a fish that needs help with vocals? Auto-tuna. Animals
  26. #26 Why did the dolphin laugh at the seahorse? It looked a little too horsey. Animals
  27. #27 Why don't kangaroos make good librarians? They're always jumping to conclusions. Animals
  28. #28 What's a sheep's favorite kind of math? Multiplication — they love to multiply. Animals
  29. #29 What do you call a parrot that flew away? A polygon. Animals
  30. #30 Why was the owl always so quiet? He didn't give a hoot. Animals

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